At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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