nut hugger
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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