Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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