The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
he just fucked me for my cheese.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
