hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
