are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
my phone needs a breathalizer
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
