Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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