so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize