Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.

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(251): View more from Alabama

As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.

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(718): View more from New York

you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.

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21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(248): View more from Michigan

The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk

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(+61): View more from Australia

I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles

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(913): View more from Kansas

This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.

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(720): View more from Colorado

side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?

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(805): View more from California

I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.

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