3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.