This is not my ceiling
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
