suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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