So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
