haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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