should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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