She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
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