i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
