I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
