they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
