She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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