I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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