Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I wear drunk well.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
