He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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