He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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