i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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