I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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