are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
