no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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