So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
