you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
