Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
