A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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