I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize
