We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
last night I used snow as a chaser
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
