put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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