the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
