OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
