Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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