you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
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