piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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