got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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