i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
