Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
