So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
