We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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