whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
