how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
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