I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
