AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
