I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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