So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
high people should be assigned attendants
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch