Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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