she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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