and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize